Speak up on the Day of Silence!
April 15, 2010 by Guest Authors
Filed under Activism & Media, Featured
The Day of Silence, which is sponsored by the Gay, Lesbian and Straight Education Network (GLSEN), fast approaches. This year it will take place in most public schools on April 16. On this day, thousands of public high schools and increasing numbers of middle schools will allow students to remain silent throughout an entire day-even during instructional time-to promote GLSEN’s socio-political goals and its controversial, unproven, and destructive theories on the nature and morality of homosexuality. (American Family Association)
Elementary schools are next. In East London to celebrate Lesbian Gay Bisexual Transgenders History Month, primary school students watched a special adaptation of Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet renamed Romeo and Julian. Stories covered in the lessons at George Tomlinson School included a fairytale about a prince who turns down three princesses before falling in love with one of their brothers and the tale of Roy and Silo – two male penguins who fall in love.
We as parents cannot remain passive about this. Even if you are not a parent and especially if you are a youth group leader, you need to make parents in your life aware of this issue. Many parents are not aware of this movement or think will not affect their child. This lax attitude leads to us holding our heads when it is too late. I’ll tell you how it personally affected me. I attended an all-women liberal arts college in Wellesley, Massachusetts. During our first year orientation, we gathered in the common room where mats were laid out of us. A senior asked us to lie down on the mat and close our eyes. Scared to death, at 17 fresh of the plane from Lahore, Pakistan, I had no clue what they expected from us. It wasn’t anything promiscuous, God forbid. They just asked us to close our eyes and imagine a world where daddies were only married to daddies and mommies were married to mommies and if I was a little girl in that world, who liked the little boy across the street but I couldn’t because mommies could only marry mommies. Very innocent, the words.
Those words stuck with me, I still remember them after 17 years. Once you have the vocabulary to talk with children about homosexuality, it becomes very easy says Dr. Justin Richardson, a Harvard-educated psychiatrist and director of Columbia University’s Center for Lesbian, Gay and Bisexual Mental Health. Richardson says educators need to aid the pre-homosexual child with a supportive school environment, paving the way for his later coming out. He claims that a child’s sexual orientation is determined very early in life around four years of age, so why not prepare the pre-homosexual child for the inevitable. This was him speaking 10 years ago at a teachers conference. This agenda is at work in our public school system. Unless Allah (SWT) sends His help or some azaab (Aa’oodubillah), this fitnah is very real.
In my orientation, I also heard a young, black woman talk about her life as a poor, black, gay teenager. I met many intelligent women who were kind and gentle and gay. I remember being admonished by the several housemates for thinking that homosexuality was a mental abnormality akin to physical abnormalities. I was figuratively ‘hypnotised’ into believing that it was natural for 10% of the human race to be homosexual and they couldn’t control themselves. That December when I went to visit my parents over winter break, my sister snapped me out of my brainwashed state. She said ‘Apa! Listen to yourself.’
In psychology, the study of brainwashing, often referred to as thought reform, falls into the sphere of “social influence.” According to Julia Layton, author of How brainwashing works, “social influence happens every minute of every day. It’s the collection of ways in which people can change other people’s attitudes, beliefs and behaviors. For instance, the compliance method aims to produce a change in a person’s behavior and is not concerned with his attitudes or beliefs. It’s the “Just do it” approach. Persuasion, on the other hand, aims for a change in attitude, or “Do it because it’ll make you feel accepted/good/happy/healthy/successful.” The education method (which is called the “propaganda method” when you don’t believe in what’s being taught) goes for the social-influence gold, trying to affect a change in the person’s beliefs, along the lines of “Do it because you know it’s the right thing to do.” Brainwashing is a severe form of social influence that combines all of these approaches to cause changes in someone’s way of thinking without that person’s consent and often against his will.”
I was 17; away from home but brimming with the confidence that children raised in a Muslim country exude. Now imagine your middle schooler or your teen. Her politically correct classmates surround her; she doesn’t know what to say when her honor society buddy starts exhibiting ‘homosexual’ traits. Imagine being a student whose religion teaches her that homosexuality is a sin being in that environment. Being judged by their peers because they did not remain silent in support. If you disagree with homosexuality you are called a bigot or a homophobe. Your teachers and mentors who instruct you from 8 in the morn to 3 in the afternoon, framing their lessons around Day of Silence. The adolescent culture is liberal, and adolescents desire to fit in. The vast majority of conservative teens does not feel comfortable vocally opposing their culture and will not do so. We as adults, often don’t have the guts to speak up against homosexuality, let alone teenagers.
Alan Chambersis, a gay man who overcame unwanted homosexuality and started a family and author of Leaving Homosexuality says:“The Day of Silence leads to a slanted discussion about homosexuality. … because students are being bombarded from every side on the issue of homosexuality …seemingly the only voices that are allowed or respected in the public school system are those from a pro-gay side. It’s important for everyone to have a voice on this issue and for every opinion to be expressed. If one side is going to be expressed, then the other should be as well.”
As a Muslim, I sympathize with others who suffer discrimination but agree with following stance.“Day of Silence participants claim they seek to end discrimination. There is, however, a problem with the way “discrimination” is defined in public discourse today. Groups like GLSEN believe that statements of moral conviction with which they disagree constitute prejudice or discrimination. While relentlessly promoting this view, administrators are never asked to provide evidence for the dubious presuppositions on which claims of discrimination are based. They are never asked to provide evidence for the arguable claim that homosexuality is equivalent to race; or that disapproval of homosexual conduct is equivalent to racism; or that homosexual impulses are biologically determined; or that the presence of biological influences in shaping desire renders a behavior automatically moral. The time is long past that parents demand justification for those claims.
If we allow schools to define discrimination so expansively as to prohibit all statements of moral conviction, character development is compromised and speech rights are trampled. And if administrators continue to define discrimination in such a way as to preclude only some statements of moral conviction, they violate their pedagogical commitment to intellectual diversity and render the classroom a place of indoctrination.”
Think of your 15-year-old cousin, who can’t have girlfriend because it is against our deen, is teased at school, called a pansy and wonders whether he is. We need to talk about this, tell them that Allah loves them and if they are having these feelings then they need roohani-spiritual help. Not shun them and turn them over to the wolves, force them out of the folds of Islam.
Some people worry that them taking a stance will adversely affect their children’s grades- What kind of Muslims are we raising? ‘cowardly conformists’ or those who follow the footsteps of the Sahabah. We need to teach them to stand up for their beliefs even if they have to sacrifice something. If the teacher does punish them in some way, this is unethical and the parents should take it to the school administration.
“O you who believe. Ward off from yourselves and your families a Fire (Hell) whose fuel is men and stones, over which are (appointed) angels stern (and) severe, who disobey not, (from executing) the commands they receive from Allah, but do that which they are commanded.” [Quran At-Tahrim 66:6]
Most of the following material is from a website sponsored by Pro-Family groups calling for national support for Day of Silence Walkout. (www.doswalkout.net) Unfortunately Muslim organizations, media groups and masjids have shied away from supporting this cause. So spread the word on your masjid lists, Muslim websites etc.
Parents must actively oppose this hijacking of the classroom for political purposes. You can help de-politicize the learning environment, which is paid by taxpayers money, by calling your child out of school if your child’s school allows students to remain silent during instructional time on the Day of Silence.
If students will be permitted to remain silent, parents can express their opposition most effectively by calling their children out of school on the Day of Silence and sending letters of explanation to their administrators, their children’s teachers, and all school board members. One reason this is effective is that most school districts lose money for each student absence.
School administrators err when they allow the classroom to be disrupted and politicized by granting students permission to remain silent throughout an entire day.
Day of Silence – What Should Parents Do?
1. Call your local schools and ask whether they permit students or teachers to remain silent in the classroom on “Day of Silence.” IMPORTANT: Do not ask any administrator, school board member, or teacher if the school sponsors, endorses, or supports DOS. Schools do not technically sponsor the Day of Silence. Technically, it is students, often students in the gay-straight alliance, who sponsor it. Many administrators will tell you that they do not sponsor the DOS when, in fact, they do permit students and sometimes even teachers to remain silent during instructional time. Also ask administrators whether they permit teachers to create lesson plans to accommodate student silence.
2. Find out what date the event is planned for your school. (The national date in 2010 is April 16, but some schools observe DOS on a different date).
3. Inform the school of your intention to keep your children home on that date and explain why. Download the sample letter from www.lordsfavors.wordpress.com or from www.doswalkout.net
4. Explain to your children why you’re taking a stand:
a. Homosexual behavior is not an innate identity.
b. No matter what factors may influence homosexual feelings, freely chosen homosexual behavior is immoral and should be resisted.
c. Homosexuality is not equivalent to race.
d. Disapproval of homosexuality is not equivalent to racism; nor is it hatred; nor is it bullying; nor does it constitute an incitement to violence. It is permissible and ethical to express disapproval of homosexuality. Just because someone may feel bad when hearing that someone disapproves of homosexuality does not mean that disapproval is cruel or wrong.
e. No school should support a view of homosexuality that is unproven and controversial, and that is physically, emotionally, and spiritually destructive to individuals and society.
f. No school should allow instructional time to be politicized.
By Hena Zuberi Siddiqui
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Hi very good sharing. thanks a lot
I never heard of The Day of Silence.
Jazakumullah Khair for sharing.
Assalam Aleikum !
Thank u sister for enlightening us. I was unaware of this and I am truly shocked I know it won’t be long before it gets to the US, but it is important to be aware of our surroundings no matter where it may be. I agree that it’s discrimanatory to not allow those with opposed and sound points of view to have a voice. May Allah reward u for your outward knowledge and words..
Blessings,
sister A
wow…. I’ve never heard of this before either. I am interested to see how common this is here in California. (Anyone want to speak up about this?)
This never occurred when I was in school.
I think as a Muslim parent, I teach my kids that all human beings have rights to good treatment, and so forth – but having Rahma for others is different than agreeing to promote sinful behavior.
Sh. Adbullah Adhami has an AWESOME lecture series on Family & Society, where he talks about this subject to some extent, on a very intellectual plane.
He reminds Muslims (my memory recalling, not his words) that we should not just hate people of claim to be gay, but understand that according to statistics, the vast majority of these individuals suffered from some form of sexual abuse as children, and this has heavily affected their sense of sexuality.
Therefore, he said, with Muslims heading this way, we should first seek to understand the psychological implications that have taken place, and handle things from the root cause.
Interesting feedback from kids in our youth group in California; those that attended public school with very large, affluent Jewish & Asian concentration accounted that there was not much support nor was there a big hoopla. But those that attended schools in more homogeneous, less privileged neighborhoods said in some cases up to 90% of class time was used up discussing.
We vilify the act not out of hatred towards them but because Allah in His Majesty hates the act.
They are human, among the best of creation made by Allah to live as He wants us to. Read the struggles of so many Muslim brothers who are fighting against their nafs to stay within the commands of Allah in the link gaymuslims.org. Only Allah knows how much He loves them.
What I am asking for the freedom to call a sin a sin. They are sinning just as we sin by lying or cheating. We have to believe that Allah is Rahman and can forgive anything except shirk as long as we repent.
Tolerance does not mean support and schools should leave it to the parents to talk about it. If I can not say God’s name in my kids’ school- believe me their teachers remind me every time I am in their class, then why talk about sexual preference which is such a private topic. It is not the job of the school to raise our children.
They try to equate to race- as one of my African American students said- “Its a choice, and all to often this choice seems to change for the kids around me every week. But I can’t get up one morning and decide ‘hey! I feel like being black today”