Comments on: Parenting Isn’t about Kids

By: Sahm

Sahm — Thu, 31 Dec 2009 17:25:19 +0000

jazakillah khayr, that would be very helpful if you can write about the follow up article

i actually got the “screamfree” cd set from the library, will be listening to it soon iA

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By: B

Thu, 31 Dec 2009 05:08:49 +0000

Yes, please!

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By: Olivia (author)

Olivia (author) — Thu, 31 Dec 2009 03:40:14 +0000

Very good question. Not screaming does equate with no disciplining. Screamfree is about realizing that screaming is not a very effective form of discpline or guidance. Insha'Allah I think it is time for me to write the follow-up article I mentioned earlier about discipline =)

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By: Sahm

Sahm — Fri, 25 Dec 2009 05:14:13 +0000

assalamu alaykum i love the scream free attitude, but i was wondering about another part of this attitude: if we as parents have the attitude that we can't control our children's behavior, then do you think that maybe we'll become lazy when our children are doing something wrong? i know this one mom who told me that i've told my daughters right from wrong and now its up to them to choose which direction they want to follow. Now her daughters hanging out in clubs with beer in their hands... so how do you discipline and still have the attitude that it is not up to you to control the child's behavior...?

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By: Holly Garza

Holly Garza — Wed, 21 Oct 2009 03:05:43 +0000

Wow Liv JazakAllah Khayer for sharing. I didn't know you wrote! mashaAllah thanks for sharing the article. I usually read/comment here and it was a pleasure seeing you're name at the end.

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By: Lat

Lat — Fri, 02 Oct 2009 00:19:23 +0000

This is pretty challenging task,I must say.Yelling at my kids does produce results but they seem temporary. What else can I do than just being calm? What about silent treatment?

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By: Healthy Moms

Healthy Moms — Mon, 21 Sep 2009 18:31:19 +0000

I'll admit I am a yeller and need to learn to calm myself down.

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By: Olivia

Olivia — Sun, 13 Sep 2009 19:11:46 +0000

Thank you, Colleen. Glad you liked the article =) Sister Rubina, insha'Allah keep us posted. In particular this is a great time to be Screamfree, as he seems to be struggling with his self-image. I would say even let him not wear them and tell him its his decision. You can tell him in a Screamfree way how you feel about him not wearing them or what your concerns are (like, "I'm worried you'll start to get a headache, but it's your choice to take that risk.") Of course how you speak to him is very dependent on his age. Don't take it personally if he doesn't seem cooperative, as he may just need time to "get over" any comment that was made to him, and having mom stressed out won't help speed that process. Continue to focus on yourself and try to discover what thoughts your having that make you feel so anxious about this issue and see how much of it really has to do with you instead of him. Good luck! =)

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By: mom2Bonedayinshallah

mom2Bonedayinshallah — Sat, 12 Sep 2009 07:56:58 +0000

Thank you- inshallah I'll try to apply this advice as a sibling, daughter and teacher- it's very relevant.

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By: rubina islam

rubina islam — Sat, 12 Sep 2009 04:11:09 +0000

I came to know of this website and also your article today. I truely needed to read this as I am feeling absolutely frustrated with my son's behaviour. He just won't wear his glasses in public places because someone must have told him that he looks dumb in them!! He is foolish enough to believe it and no matter how much we try, he is being very defiant. I will inA try your approach. I'll keep you posted as to how it goes. JAK for your advise.

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