Gossip Girls.

“Did you just see the hijaab she was wearing? OH EM GEE! It was hideous!” Maryam snickers at the fashion mistake walking away.

“Subhaan’Allaah, I can’t believe she’d talk to a brother let alone meet with him,” she says as though all dignity begins and ends with her.

Maryam giggles to Salma: “Sara told me about Muhammad proposing to Aisha! OMG I should tell Sana! She’ll be sooooo jealous!!!”

Let me give ya’ll a little scenario here:

Sara tells Maryam about the “betrothal,” even though it’s not her news to broadcast. To top it off, she heads off to tell Sana who she believes will be hurt by this news. Now Sana knows and then another sister finds out, followed by another and another. Before Aisha has even accepted the proposal, the whole town knows about something that is private between Aisha and Muhammad! Keep in mind that when information is transferred from one person to another, a thing or two is always added to it. It can often end up as an exaggerated piece of news. For example, the original scoop where Muhammad was proposing to Aisha (what was he thinking?!) will turn into: “Muhammad proposed to Aisha because they both love each other and they were even MEETING!!!”

Now because of the resulting hyperbole, people will start assuming all sorts of things about two innocent people who merely want to get married. They will become talk of the town for something they have never even done. Imagine the effect this will have on the lives of the two people involved? For one, news about marriage/engagement/proposal carries the consequence or weight of being affected by evil eye. What people don’t realize is the intensity of their actions and the damage evil eye can do to someone else. In a hadeeth the Prophet (sallallaahu `alayhi wasallam) said: “The evil eye sends a man into his grave, and a camel into the cooking pot.” (Hasan; al-Albani)

I have seen this happen so many times and in so many different situations. Women (even men) – and sadly sometimes even those who are well-aware of the rulings of gossiping – tend to fall into this trap of shaytaan and end up not just jeopardizing their own afterlife but also the lives of those they gossip about. Hasan al-Basri (rahimahullaah) said about such people: “These people have become bored with worship, and speech has become light upon their tongues, and their piety has decreased, and that is why they speak.”

Gossip, backbiting and slander has become so common amongst women that even religious circles or gatherings are not void of these acts. It’s everywhere: on the television, on the bus, the subways, at restaurants, gatherings, and even in bed just before going to sleep. “He did what? She said that? When did they go there?” All for a false sense of being informed or entertainment. It might be about Bradgelina or Mariah Carey but it breeds a sense of entitlement to knowing about the private lives of people.

“And backbite not one another. Would one of you like to eat the flesh of his dead brother? You would hate it (so hate backbiting). And fear Allah. Verily, Allah is the One Who forgives and accepts repentance, Most Merciful.” (49:12)

Imagine eating a raw piece of meat? And I’m not even talking about blue rare (or blood rare) steaks. I’m talking about eating raw human flesh. Heard of Anthropophagy? It is the eating of human flesh. It’s cannibalism; it’s disgusting and gross. When we engage in backbiting, we become Cannibals. The next time you’re about to spew out words about your Muslim sister or brother, remind yourself of this. We can’t forget the punishment for those who engage in this:

The Prophet (sallallaahu `alayhi wasallam) said: When I was taken up into heaven, I passed by people who had copper claws tearing at their faces and chests. I asked, ‘Who are these O Jibreel?’ He replied: ‘They are those who ate the flesh of people and insulted their honor. (Ahmad, Abu Dawood)

Subhaan’Allaah! what women may not realize is that these acts are like filth coming forth from their tongues. What comes from your mouths is a reflection of what is concealed in your hearts. The Prophet (sallallaahu `alayhi wasallam) that: “The Imaan of Allaah’s servant will not be upright until his heart is upright and his heart will not be upright until his tongue is upright.” (Musnad Imaam Ahmad)

Notice the hadeeth “..and insulted their honor.” A person who has no belief, no faith and hence no morals, can defame me, insult me, humiliate me, run me down with every filthy word out there in their dictionaries and it won’t hurt me. Why? Because it’s expected of them. But when the same comes from a believer – from someone who Allaah created in the best of molds and endowed upon him/her the best of religions, the only path of true Guidance, and created for him/her a Paradise wherein He placed things that no eye has ever seen the likes thereof – then that shakes your soul. They are held to a higher standard.

Fix your heart.

Secure your imaan.

Guard your relationship with Allaah, and your tongues will be safe.

Don’t make other people’s business your own. Tackle your own problems. Look into yourself, deeper than your soul and find your own faults. If you do that, you won’t have time to point fingers at others. There will come a day, when a single word that escapes your lips could lead you to an eternal Hellfire. So be mindful of everything that you say.

Remind, remind, remind.. yourselves and others. For reminders indeed benefit the believers {adh-Dhariyaat:55}. When you see someone absorbed in any of the above acts, do not hesitate to stop them. And if they don’t stop, do not hesitate to leave their company because they will not help you in your path to Jannah. Our ultimate goal is to seek the Pleasure of Allaah, not the pleasure of people. Just remember, it all lies within your hearts. If your hearts are repaired, your tongues will reflect the purity of it.

Photo Courtsey: DeviantArt