Married Men: The Untouchable Species
February 11, 2009 by Cindy A
Filed under Relationships
by Cindy A.
It was a live night: good food, company and laughter. At most gatherings, men and women are segregated, but since this was more of an intimate family and friend’s night, we sat together. The men cracked jokes and the women laughed. Being the only young singleton lady of the bunch I am usually target for their jokes. One of the husbands decided it would be funny to ridicule my tea-making skills. Although they laughed at my expense, I found it hilarious too and wasn’t shy to return the favor just as strong.
That’s when my mom gave me the “nudge!”
My mom would explain later, in the car, that I had to watch it when it came to married men–even if they are twice my age! I was a little surprised by what she said. I always viewed my friends’ husbands more like older brothers or an uncle type figure.
The rule seems to change according to the couple. One of my friend’s husbands runs If I happen to be in proximity. If we ever meet on the street, he won’t be able to identify me although I’ve been friends with his wife for years and have eaten at their house almost daily. One of my other close acquaintances insists that I avoid visiting when the husband is home from work, God forbid he will see and talk to me. On the other hand, another couple I know is open about inviting me over to cook dinner with the family while we share laughter and play with the children.
These mixed signals puts a single lady like myself in an awkward position. Recently I started working on a project with a few people which involved emailing and phoning members of the team. One of the team members is married. His wife isn’t active and shows no interest in being part of our team. When I do phone, I get the wife first. After hearing about her week and what she cooked for the day, she gives me the “all-clear” to speak to the untouchable husband on speaker phone. I know because I hear my echo sometimes and a cough or two from the wife.
The issue becomes even more intense when you are speaking to a married Sheikh. It’s almost impossible to go directly to the Sheikh without going through a filter of wives, daughters or sisters. Suddenly our Sheikh screen who could consult him on spiritual matters. By the time the wife or female relative delivers the answer, it’s tainted by the individual’s own thoughts and opinions. Is that really fair? Who has the training anyways, isn’t it the Sheikh?
I wonder sometimes, what people expect to happen from a brief encounter at a dinner party or a focused phone conversation. Will a husband from the first glance dump his family and fall for a single, much younger girl? Where is trust, faith and fear of God? I believe Islam established a fine system where we can all safely interact without need of awkwardness. We can–as slaves of Allah–maintain our piety while serving our respected communities. We need to start trusting ourselves more and overcoming these barriers created by thousands of years worth of cultural baggage.
As a woman in my society, I play many roles. Sometimes that role might include interaction with the untouchable married species. I will not have someone’s insecurity deter my efforts to better my community. Not all single ladies are husband snatchers, we’re on your side.
Courtesy Photo by Jahat.
(9 votes, average: 2.44 out of 5)
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Great job! Seriously though, it’s true– the rules do change person to person, couple to couple.. some of it’s a personality issue actually.
Thus it makes it confusing
!
Asalaamu alaikum,
Alahamdullilah that we have our own feelings to sort through some things. I must add though, that Islam is a complete way of life and it shouldn’t change from “person to person”. The Quran and the Sunnah is our guide. Men and women are not created the same, according to Allah. It’s better to leave a message with a wife, or put it in writing, keep it short and concise, avoid inter-mingling, check your intentions, and fear Allah. This way you save yourself from the hellfire and possibly another believer.
“Indeed from the teachings of the first prophets which has reached you is, ‘If you do not have shyness, then do as you please.” (Al-Bukhari)
“Tell the believing men to lower their gaze and be modest. That is purer for them. Lo! God is Aware of what they do. And tell the believing women to lower their gaze and be modest, and to display of their adornment only that which is apparent, and to draw their veils over their chests, and not to reveal their adornment.” (Quran 24:30)
“If
you keep your duty (to Allaah), then be not soft in speech, lest he in
whose heart is a disease should be moved with desire.”
“O wives of the Prophet! You are not like any other women. If
you keep your duty (to Allaah), then be not soft in speech, lest he in
whose heart is a disease should be moved with desire, but speak in
an honorable manner. And stay in your houses, and do not display
yourselves like that of the times of ignorance, and perform the
Salaat, and give Zakaat and obey Allaah and His Messenger. …” [Soorah Al-Ahzab 33:32-34].
I feel you Cindy! It makes it so difficult to get work done when you have to deal with other people’s marital insecurities and drama. I think that there’s a responsibility with the married couple to deal with things in a way that impacts innocent bystanders (us, the active women that have to interact with their husbands) to a minimum.
I think a big problem is the uncertainty and awkwardness attached to these situations. If these married men would just say openly and up-front the way they operate, I think that would help avoid unnecessary problems/difficulty for active women trying to work with them. Even if they feel there is an Islamic “norm,” there definitely isn’t one in terms of practice, so if people just explain things, I think it’s not a problem. A friend doesn’t want me over her house when her husband is around? I’m totally cool with that, in fact it would make me more comfortable. But if he comes home unexpectedly and she screeches at me to get out while pushing me out the door, then we have a problem
I wonder though Cindy, what do you think though in terms of brothers who interact differently with females after they [the brothers] get married?
I absolutely agree. If people are honest about their expectations, life would be much easier. However, if a person chooses a leadership position, they need to reconsider their position if they are only willing to deal with one gender.
As your question,
I think it might be expected once a person enters a new relationship that their relationships might change. If the person is in the leadership position however, they need to reevaluate that position and how these changes would effect it.
In addition to people’s own insecurities and so forth; I also believe that the misconcept of “interaction with the opposite sex” in Islamic ways has something to do with it too. Some men–married ones in our case– as well as women argue that men and women should avoid any interaction at all. Of course, for some this is just an excuse to cover their own insecurity but most of them sincerely try to do their best so as to obey the rules of our religion. The thing they do not get though is that even the Prophet and his closest circle of friends did talk to women! So the more you think it is awkward to talk to a man regardless of being single or married; the more the situation becomes awkward. Same for men talking to women too. We create an awkward situation out of a situation which is not awkward at all! The balance is everyhting; and we should all keep in mind that Islam is the most balanced religion in terms of rules of social engagements, interactions. Oh and people should differentiate between traditions and religion. It is mostly the “usually twisted” tradition which put young people in awkward situations and create unnecessary dramas; not Islam.
Busra From Turkey
p.s: Sorry for my spelling and grammar mistakes. I am not a native you know:)
Welcome, Busra to the blog!
You said,
I agree. I think that tradition and culture have shaped our beliefs. We are conditioned to assume any interaction between a male and female will lead to sex. Islam has openly discussed the issue. Men and women are ordered to lower their gaze and be modest with their interactions and actions. This doesn’t mean that ANY interaction is prohibited. If we refer to the lives of the companions of the prophet, we will find them interacting with all modesty and purpose.
So, as you call for balance, I do too.
That’s it.
Hey Cindy,
I have to agree, that such a situation really is totally inconsistent and totally awkward, but in a while I like it just like that. I’m married and my wife and I have a really trusting relationship, and therefore she doesnt mind if I hang out with my women friends, even if it just them alone. Why? because she trusts me. She too has an old family friend that she hangs out alone with, which is fine with me too. I know him, he’s great, he and I speak frequently and he’s married too and his wife is cool as well. If it were anyone else other than him, I’d feel a little weird that my wife was hanging out with another guy. And similarly, other than the few (mostly non-Muslim + 1 niqabi)women, that I am friends, if I were to hang out with another woman, I think my wife would feel awkward too.
Ok, so both her and I are allowed to do such because we trust each other and we trust the people that our spouses are hanging out with. and we both also know that it isnt 100% right, because these are non-mahrem relationships, but I guess we have a different threshold.
Now if there was someone else that we didnt know that approached our circle we’d clearly be a little stand off ish, because we just dont know the person. And its not that we dont trust them, its just weird I guess that someone wants into our space without knowing us for a while before.
I dont know, thats just my perspective, so I guess I’d say you just have to wiggle when dealing with married couples, some will be cool with it and others not. It depends on how much the couples trust each other and how their jealous tendencies are. But as a single woman, youre definitely in the crappiest position because there is absolutely no definite rule about this, unless you strictly follow the mahrem settings.
good luck though and thanks for posting.
Interesting point of view, Muhammad! So long as you and the wifey are happy with the arrangement, who is anyone to argue?
Assalam Alaikum Wa Rahmatullah
Bro, I think you SHOULD be concerned when your wife hangs out with males alone and I think your wife SHOULD be concerned when you hang out with women alone. As the Nabi sal Allaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam told us, the third party is shaytaan. As much as you may think you will not fall into the haraam, you COULD.
I, personally, get along a lot better with guys cos I grew up with 3 older brothers and there’s less drama with ‘em. But…I know that as much as I tell myself I won’t fall into haraam, the fact that I am “friends” with them (which usually entails some type of close relationship) makes me feel uncomfortable. That doesn’t mean you cant talk to the opposite gender, but just make sure that it’s something that isn’t trivial and that there is proper conduct from both sides (i.e. following the Islaamic guidelines). I, too, am still trying to work on this, and believe me, I’ve got a LONG way to go, but I just felt that I needed to comment on your post.
As for the original post, I agree that the matters discussed should only be known to the shaykh cos you don’t want your business getting known to the entire world AND you want a qualified opinion.
jazakumAllaahu khairan, Assalam Alaikum Wa Rahmatullah
“The issue becomes even more intense when you are speaking to a married Sheikh. It’s almost impossible to go directly to the Sheikh without going through a filter of wives, daughters or sisters. Suddenly our Sheikh screen who could consult him on spiritual matters. By the time the wife or female relative delivers the answer, it’s tainted by the individual’s own thoughts and opinions. Is that really fair? Who has the training anyways, isn’t it the Sheikh?”
This just made me literally ill and brought back horrible memories for me. I soooo remember having to go through that bogus (insecure) chain of command to reach the Sheikh! If, God forbid, I ever need to talk to one again, I will seriously tell the females off. Some women are truly too foolish for words.
Do you care to elaborate? What were some challenges you faced when you needed the assistance of your local Sheikh?
I bet it’s just insecurity. The more sheltered a life the wife has led, the more she will be insecure and will cling to her husband. If a women has been out there she knows it means nothing.
Having said that, there are times it means something!
The correct answer to everything: “It depends!”
Or if you prefer the Shaikh version: “Allah and His messenger knows best!”
I do believe, Mezba that upbringing is an important factor in this discussion. Rather this article is focusing on the interaction of leaders who are married in the community with the single ladies. Should the fact that a person is committed to another person inhibit that person from serving his community? On the flip side, should a woman do the same?
It’s all about intentions it seems?
As a single person, it’s annoying to deal with other people’s insecurity or our insecurity of their insecurity!
Not getting into halal/haram issues of cross gender interactions, we have to admit that the flip side argument IS VALID too.
Many marriages have broken (Muslims and non) based on work-based interactions.
I think what you have described is not just insecurity but multiple small problems piled up (e.g. some men/women not observing the proper rules, lack of knowledge women shaikhas, etc.)
PS: It’s better not to support google ads, they degrade Muslim sites.
And your solution?
I think sometimes it boils down to how far husbands make their wives feel secure in their marriage.Women do learn from other women lived experiences,as they do not want to face a similar situation with their marriages going down the slope.It’s just not the women,it’s the men too.In the beginning it’s all fine.But somewhere along the lines,hearts change and waver and then trouble sets in.I’m not saying all men are like that.But most men are!
Thanks Lat for dropping by!
Salams sisters,
I think the trap lies in the following frame of mind:
“I always viewed my friends’ husbands more like older brothers or an uncle type figure.”
I am the first to fall into the trap, especially in small, friendly, mixed gatherings where it’s difficult to refrain from jokes and winks. One is also careful not to be too cold or seem unwelcoming. Still, in this instance, I think it’s better to err on the side of caution.
The bottom line is, as we all know, non-mahram men are non-mahram men, relatives or not, friends or not, single or not. It’s not always easy to remember that, I am the first to admit.
Jazaki Allah khairan for sharing =)
wa selams — good point! letting our guard down is something to be wary of.
Hmm. Good points.
What do you suggest one should do to be cautious?
Hmm well I think while on one hand there’s a problem when the person you’re dealing with is inconsistent or unclear as to how they interact, in terms of being cautious, the most important thing is to maintain an awareness of how you’re interacting. Are you personally consistent with how you act? Or is your interaction based on the limits of the person you’re interacting with? If it’s the latter, there’s a problem, because it means you’re using a person as your standard instead of Islam. You can’t just be a leaf blowing in the wind.
I’m wondering how much the dynamics change when the woman is married and is being contacted by men working with her on projects and things.
I think when someone is so much older that he reminds you of your father, we tend to let our guard down. I sat across from an “uncle” and told him with a lot of enthusiasm and interest about my trip abroad while I can’t see myself being as animated and engaging with someone closer to me in age.
I’ve also noticed the same people that seem to be very very conservative around other Muslims may not be so much when they are around non muslims…anyone else notice that? Nice, shy brother that stares at his shoes and hardly speaks up with Muslimahs; yet they can laugh it up and get chummy with non Muslim girls. I feel like there should be a happy medium where you apply a similar standard to all non mahram females and non mahram males without being totally socially inept or breaking boundaries.
THANK YOU!
Makes me wonder, why? Why the double standard? The very same men go to their jobs and interact freely with their female coworkers. They might go out on an “office” lunch or joke freely. When it comes to a poor female in a mosque, she is suddenly a ghost and he runs away before “fitnah” happens.
I do think there should be a balance.
Asalamu alaikum, sisters and brothers! I have two points or anecdotes to relate, I will to deal with the shortest one first.
Acting differently among Muslims vs. non-Muslims. Well for a convert, there is the issue of what was “normal” before and what is “normal” now. Generally I have always kept my work relationships very professional, even not getting too close to other women! So for the most part there is not a huge amount of difference. I have felt, however, more embarrassment or insecurity in the Muslim crowd, maybe for 2 reasons 1: being unsure of what your new companions think is acceptable and 2: when you catch yourself verging on the immodest, you feel shame. Think of Adam and Eve when they first realized their nakedness.
My second comment is an explanation and an apology, dear Cindy! If I have given the impression I don’t want you to come over when my husband is home, that is not the intent! One reason, I thought you would be more comfortable and perhaps want to remove hijab with no men in the house
Second reason, I have restrictions when my husband’s friends come over. I am “invited” to say hello and then go to my room (or anywhere out of sight). Sure, I can come get a drink or pass through careful to keep my gaze brief or to the floor…yet even before my coming to Islam I respect this custom. They have always been equally polite – one time I sat down to eat at the dining room table, and the young (unmarried man) already sitting quietly got up and went to the kitchen table. Probably my husband would have clocked him over the head if he had not moved! So you see, my presence is not just a prohibition on me, but discomforting for them. Kind of like brother Ryan was saying… and my husband is expected the same, if my friends are here (Muslim or not!), he disappears! So perhaps some of your married friends, they are not excluding you or not wanting you to see their men, but perhaps considering their husbands’ possible discomfort at seeing you. I think it all boils down to some of the others’ comments, each individual has different ideas and when thoughts are unspoken, there are sure to be some misunderstandings and possible hurt feelings.
Madaline,
I can only imagine how confusing it is to hop into all this as a convert to Islam.
I hope you understand that the article is geared towards leaders and their relationships with single women. As when it comes to social purposes, I think that all depends on the couple. As demonstrated through the comments, some people disagree on the limits or lack of limits. I think a lot of culture is involved in this one. I find it all very confusing, but I tend to stay out of trouble when possible.
I hope you don’t take this personally, Mad. This was meant as a general statement, nothing personal.
I appreciate your comments!
I know! Just I read something and can’t help think “Wow guilty! I did that!”
Great discussion!
From a male perspective, I’d like to chime in. As a husband, I make sure that I am totally off limits to my wife’s friends and even female relatives. I don’t have any female friends, not one, although I have many male friends (Alhumdulilah). I am very secure in the love and dedication I have for my wife. I think that even when people’s hearts are pure and they have good intentions, barriers of modesty and decency can be quickly be broken down between men and women. Allah put a natural tension between men and women. No matter how much a man loves his wife, if he allows himself to look at and interact with other women (beyond what is necessary) he may become mentally preoccupied by another woman or even physically attracted. It’s not a choice, it’s just the way it is. In light of this fact (that all men know, and for some reason women don’t believe) is just plain arrogant for a man to think he can interact with women and believe that nothing bad could ever come of it. Of course, it won’t always be the case that something bad will come of it, but we can’t make a general rule based on specific cases. The more a man allows this modesty to be disregarded, the more likely it is he’s going to get involved in something completely unnecessary and of no benefit. Any man that denies this is (in my opinion) most likely looking for trouble, or not being honest with himself. This kind of gender interaction is a way of putting ones eman to the test. If you value your eman, don’t test it. You value your life, you don’t test that, so don’t test your eman. Of course, Allah Known Best.
Well, if a man and woman maintain the Islamic guidelines then they shouldn’t have a problem dealing with one another. Isn’t that the reason Islam set the guidelines?
I think what some people differ on are the guidelines. Some people think complete segregation is the answers, other think the opposite. Where is the true Islam?
The issue is clear in the Shari’ah, Cindy. It’s up to each person to decide if they want to implement it or not. We are allowed to talk to the opposite gender if needed but there must be a need and things must be within limits. Limits include getting to the point, proper dress, lowering of the gaze, respect, etc. Laughing, joking around, none of this is acceptable. It doesn’t matter if we look up to them, see them as older, etc. Islam is a religion that is here to protect us from anything that may lead us to something prohibited and we are human beings and we err. If we acknowledge our place, our weakness, and the importance of lowering the gaze and being careful with the opposite gender, then insha’Allah everything will go smoothly and we won’t experience the chaos that many are experiencing for being heedless.
well said, Umm Layth.
I mean no disrespect, I strongly urge you to become well acquainted with the specific guidelines within Islam that pertain to gender interaction. There are many verses of Quran as well as Sunnah of the Prophet, peace be upon him that deal with this matter. Many of the mainstream Islamic speakers also talk about this. People can choose to not follow them, or choose to be unaware of them but you are walking a dangerous path by suggesting there is some “true Islam” that would allow for men and women to drop their guards and fraternize. Islam is very clear on this issue.
Well, Ryan.
It would be nice if you source these places you are referring to so myself and other readers can benefit, and perhaps you can gain some rewards while you are at it.
In addition, please reference to me how the Prophet (pbuh) dealt with the sahabyaat? We are here to learn, aren’t we?
so let’s talk.
Well, as far as the household goes, I have a saying from my grandmother:
“Never let a woman alone in your house with your husband, or a man alone in your house with your wife.”
That’s an old saying, my grandmother is Christian.
LOL.
And she said it well
and ain’t that the truth!
Related post:
http://hijabman.com/journal/a-simple-dating-guide-for-muslims-introduction
I know few married girls where their moms emphasize to not hang out with their unmarried friends. I think it’s a cultural thing- the reason could be that the moms don’t want the friends to be jealous of their married daughters because they were able to get husbands. Have you guys heard this before?
As a non-Muslim I’ve come to the conclusion that the only interaction promoted between men and women in Islam seems to be one of lust. The only time men and women should communicate is if they want to procreate, otherwise a woman should be hidden from men and avert the only part visible to the public, her eyes.
I don’t know if this relationship of lust is the sole depiction of the Koran, or if this is the way scholars choose to interpret it so they can use it to their own advantage.
Can someone shed some light on the subject for me?
Interesting commentary Elle. I appreciate the different viewpoint. However, if anything Islam discourages lust between men and women (unless they are married). Recognizing that lust can be generated between the genders if we’re not careful is not unfair. It’s being self-aware and taking precautions. Women are encouraged to participate in everyday life with other people as long as they and men recognize what can happen and take precautions against it. Cindy’s article talks about the dynamics of these relationships because its NOT cut and dry…its quite complex. Some of these complexities are because are created by personal preferences and others are because our society is diverse; that’s not to say a homogeneous blob of people is better…its just boring and not complex.
I’m not sure how many Muslim women you’ve met or interacted with, but there are plenty, in fact a majority who do not cover their face. Anyhow, lustful gazes are discouraged because they are just that…lustful gazes, whether from a man or woman.
Islam doesn’t discourage women from participating in life, only avoiding things which lead to unfaithfulness and immodesty.
People are just being wary. I’ve heard countless of stories. One in particular is about two female best friends who were together from a young age. One women married a Muslim and ended up converting and moving away. Her best friend moved to her town and started visiting regularly. The next thing the woman knew, her best friend and husband were getting married. It happens often. It’s not just in Islam but in all cultures although they may not end up getting married. You watch the talk shows about how some guy cheated with his woman’s best friend or something. It’s because of their constantly close proximity. They have a chance to get intimate. Why do you think that one of the seven types of people to gain Allah’s shade on the day when there will be no shade is a man who resists a woman when she tempts him to do haram? It obviously happens often and is obviously hard to resist. Rasoolullah (S.A.W) said that when it comes to a man and a woman, if they are left alone, the third party is always Shaytan.
I don’t think men and women should be separated but I think that they shouldn’t be entirely mixed.
I knew a single gal who used to hang out with her married friend (both converts)while the spouse was around and thought nothing of it until he suddenly wanted to make her number 2. She was seriously traumatized by it, as was her friend, and now treats all Muslim men like the plague lest it happen again. Of course, she is able to maintain what is considered appropriate associations with non-Muslim males for work and such. I know many who end up with this “scurry away” from the Muslim males as quickly as possible lest they want to add you the collection or simply so they don’t talk bad about you but not feel that same urge with the non-Muslims because a conversation is not viewed as an invitation. It is somewhat sad. Young single women can’t talk (in a protected manner) with Muslim brothers but can chat up any old Non Muslim male they come across. A brother in my community complained the other day that he couldn’t even Salaam a women (with her husband by her) as a courtesy because they react with such horror. It does border the ridiculous sometimes, but often a woman will eb the target of negative talk if she even acknowledges a male with some as simply as responding (as we are required to) to a salaam.
I find it strange why such articles are allowed to be posted. If the site promotes the religion of Islam, then why allow posts which are nothing more than incorrect *opinions* and ago against it?
I’m sure every single person who has commented and those who haven’t but have read the comments deep-down knows what Shariah permits and what it doesn’t. Is an article like the one posted – which goes in direct conflict with the commandments of Allah Ta’ala – meant to be a “Quran for the 21st Century”?
Of course the Prophet of Allah (SAW) interacted with females. But did he sit in a gathering joking, winking and smiling to them? Did any of the Sahaba (RA) do this?
What is it with muslims today? Why is having a spouse not good enough? Why do you need ‘friends’ on the side? Islam allows contact with the opposite gender in situations of need. Beyond this, you delve in to haraam. Haraam doesn’t just mean fornication – any contact without need is also not permissible. We all know this.
And then people say it’s your ‘intentions’ that count. So I as a married man can have a laugh and a cuddle with my wife’s female friend because I want to promote their good friendship. Is that a good intention? And when I start developing feelings for her – then what?
Islam says do not even approach or come close to Zinnah. This means do not interact with the opposite gender unless there is need. There is no ‘good intention’ behind getting friendly with the opposite gender.
Really, please don’t just author articles to cause controversy when Islam has already drawn a line as to what is and isn’t allowed. You never know who is reading – if you lead someone to sin through your article, you will be held accountable.
Rather than questioning others’ intentions, especially if they are our Muslim brothers or sisters, we should try to make excuses for them. Especially if what they’re trying to do is according to the Qur’aan and Sunnah.
I really don’t see what is wrong with the married sisters acting the way they do around other single women, and the same for the men acting the way they do around single women. That’s what they’re supposed to do. When it comes to doing it in such a way that is inconsiderate to the third party, then that’s when it becomes a problem. But even then, we should ourselves be considerate of them, and try to be patient and understand that they’re just trying to protect themselves and their family.
Yes, it can get confusing at times, but we should just try to be more understanding and more considerate, for that is the better thing to do as a Muslim. And we should always try to improve ourselves for the sake of Allah.
Rather than trying to accommodate to each individual, it would be better to just act a certain way to all married couples, a way that will not make either parties uncomfortable. Instead of waiting for them to make their intentions clear, just assume that each couple would feel uncomfortable with another single person in the room, whether male or female, if the other is not present. And the Prophet sal Allahu alaihi wasallam said, “Leave that about which you are in doubt for that about which you are in no doubt.” (At-Tirmidhi)
And Allah knows best.
Asalam aliakaum sister,
MashAllah I think that what your saying is very true– as women we should be on each others sides, and help one another keep a good healthy, stable, and loving family together. I believe that sure, we can all work and help one another to better the community, but we cant help but feel jeolous when women speak to our men. I mean didnt the Prophets wives get jeolous as well? [ dont worry im on your side hehe] but MashAllah, we just gotta kick it down a notch and try to understand that as ladies we want our sisters to be happy and were not out there to get their men. Besides, your calling up his home to speak to him about a serious issue– its nothing personal Alhamdulilah. and astaghfurAllah if there was anything ” wrong” — why would you fone his house– outa all places! So the wives should understand that Alhamdulilah, if there are sisters calling or speaking to their husbands and its done in public then Alhamdulilah i dont think theres anything to worry about. Theres nothing to hide.
Asalaam u alaikum
I agree with Abdullah and what he said about someone else getting misguided … Hoping a more mature article from you Cindy next time inshaAllah and yes this the posting of this article should be reviewed not everyone reads the comments below..